Grateful

I’ve been tagged again! This time by the lovely and talented Heather Smith-Jones. I am supposed to list (I love lists!) 6-8 things I am grateful for. Easy!

1. My personal relationship with Jesus Christ, Creator of the Universe and Saviour of my soul.

2. My husband, Rob. The person I trust more than anyone in this world. The man of my dreams, my soul mate, my best friend.

3. My sweet, adorable boys. They make my life so wonderful.

4. The beautiful country I love in. I am SO proud to be a New Zealander!

5. My personal trials and tribulations. Now that seems like a funny thing to be grateful for, but my struggles have made me a stronger person.
Not many people know this, but I suffered quite badly with postnatal depression after the birth of both my boys. A little while ago, I did a layout on how battling PND changed my life.
(I actually did this layout as part of an application for the Up2Scrap Design Team, but that’s as far as I got with my application … I just didn’t have time to do the OTP project).

The journalling reads: It’s been a few years since I battled PND for the second time. I suffered from it when Ethan was born, and again when I had Tyler 2 years later. Both times I felt that my feelings of sadness and depression would not last. I thought they were probably linked to sleep deprivation, and the fact that both my babies had health problems as newborns. Ethan had severe gastro-esophageal reflux disease, and Tyler had consecutive urinary tract infections that eventually required surgery when he was 4 months old. But it was more than that. I was sick. I had a mental illness. It took a lot of courage to admit that I wasn’t well. I felt ashamed and inadequate. I was so angry with myself for not being able to cope. I felt like I was living in hell. I hated myself, I hated my life. I had a wonderful husband, supportive family, beautiful children. But I was so unhappy. I felt suicidal at times. I remember wanting to get in my car and just drive forever, never coming back. I kept thinking that my family would be better off without me, that they didn’t need me. Eventually, with the help and support of my husband, parents, sister and my GP, I got better. I’m not ashamed to say that I took antidepressants. Each time, I was on medication for about a year. PND changed me, it made me a stronger person.

6. Being able to work from home, doing a job I LOVE! It doesn’t get much better than that!

7. Family & friends.

8. Finding this morning that the gorgeous Kayla had written a post on her blog about ME! I feel extremely honoured to be chosen as the first scrapbooker to be “in the spotlight” on her blog.
BTW, if you’ve never read Kayla’s blog, you should definitely check it out. She’s an amazing mom, digital scrapbooker, photographer and photoshop expert!

So there is my list! Did I mention how much I love lists? It was hard to stop at 8, I could have gone on forever! I’m grateful for so many things, every single day. I have learned that no matter how bad life seems, or what crises you are going through, there is always something you can be thankful for. You may have to dig deep to find it, but it will be there. Concentrate on that, instead of the crappy stuff, and things will seem so much easier! I speak from experience here.

Okay, I’m tagging the following people:

Kayla
Kelly
Julie
Vicky
Kami

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25 thoughts on “Grateful

  1. Those are wonderful, hearfelt, honest, and thought-provoking things to be grateful for! Thank you for sharing so openly about yourself, I’m sure someone will be helped by your testimony. Thank you for posting about this!!

  2. This is a really amazing post Hannah – not just cos it’s a tag but because it’s so open. I guess that’s you eh?! :) I really love the honesty in your layout – that’s a hard enough topic to do for yourself let alone sharing it with the rest of us. I think it’s great that you do share – thank you!

    BTW – totally LOVE those papers? What are they and were do I get my hands on some??! :lol:

    I also see you tagged me – yikes! :) I will do it – but it might not be straight away (cos I’m getting ready for a Scrappink crop – yes the one that I thought was last weekend but is really tomorrow… !)

    Now – off to visit you in teh spotlight….

  3. Thank you Hannah for your open heart. You are truly an inspiring person!
    I love grateful lists and yours is a very open and honest list.
    I am off to check you in the spotlight now too.

  4. Lots of things to be grateful for, thanks for sharing Hannah. It takes a lot of courage to share what you did. As you said these things certainly make us stronger and when we lookback we can see our far we have come. I think people are still scared to admit they have suffered from depression or PND for fear people will view them differently. However I say you would be surprised to find out how many people actually have or are going through something like that. Stories like yours give others hope.

  5. Hannah – awesome post! It’s true that you do feel a closer relationship on line with people when they share these little bits of personal lives with eachother. You are so talented and beautiful in so many ways. Also, great post at Kayla’s site about you – love to see your layouts displayed – I could look at them all day and keep finding new little things about them. Also, sorry you had to go through the PND but so glad that you feel it changed you for the better! And glad you had the support/medication you needed. There’s no shame in needing or admitting that you need help and I’m glad you are here today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hugs to you!

  6. Awesome post Hannah! I love what you are grateful for – shall I just cut and paste – LOL – yep I see you have tagged me and I’m sitting here thinking of all the things I am grateful for and deciding which ones are top of my list…
    Well done on sharing your battle with PND, as you know I deal with clinical depression and have periods of extreme lows so I can relate so much. I just love how it is more talked about and more people are getting the right help for their mental illness and not stigmatized for something beyond their control.

  7. Thanks for sharing your wonderful LO and journaling as well as your list. It’s great you can share this with others and it’s through sharing and awareness that change in a society comes. Too often stigmas are attached and isolate people :(
    I know what you mean about growing through the hard times, it’s not easy but it’s worth it. I read somewhere that the gift of the wounded heart is compassion and empathy for others… so true.

  8. Yay for being tagged! Thanks Hannah:-)

    I respect you more than you will know for sharing about your depression. I am so glad that you sought help and that you had such wonderful support around you.

    And it’s so wonderful that you can scrap about it. What a great way to turn it into an experience that you survived and learned from.

    You are an amazing woman!

    Cheers to you:-)

  9. What an amazing post Hannah! I love that you have shared yourself so openly and I think it’s a real STRENGTH! It’s so hard to admit when things are tough, or you make a mistake, or you really need help. You are truly an amazing woman :D

  10. It’s nice to be positive about things that test us. And the good things too! :)

    KWYM about the PND. At least from the outside looking in. My Dad, sister, MIL and DH all have bouts of clinical depression. All are on medication and I am the first to tell them to STAY on it!

  11. What a post! WOW! As others mentioned,,,very honest, thank you for sharing such a hard part of your life…I have suffered from depression and eating disorders, it’s not the same thing as PND but still a form of depression and a sickness. I am glad things are going well for you now!

    o/t…but I wanted to let you know I made the switch on my blog…check it out when you have a chance. Thanks!!!

    Great layout, btw

  12. Thats pretty cool seeing your name in lights as such on another blog.
    Thanks for sharing your PND layout its important I think to let others know about depression and it does happen to quite a few of us.

  13. Thanks for testing out the waters on my blog! I have posted a few mini posts and working on some others. Over the next week I will be back to my compulsive blogging as well as adding more fun stuff.

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